Nice to see a coach with his priorities clearly stated and communicated to his head coach, fellow assistants and athletes. His daughters are lucky to have him.


This reminds me of my father who stopped officiating for a year to watch my football games senior year in high school.




By LEE LAMBERTS
The Holland Sentinel
Posted Sep 14, 2008 @ 11:20 PM

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Holland, MI — Hope College assistant football coach Doug Smith has left his “family” in Holland to spend more time with a family member farther away from home.


Smith and his wife, Jane, made a commitment a number of years ago that if any of their daughters played college volleyball, he would ask for time off during the football season of their senior years.
It happened in 2002 when Allison Smith was a senior at DePauw (Ind.) University and the Smiths attended many of her volleyball matches. Now, daughter Emily Smith is in her senior season at DePauw. And Doug and Jane do not plan to miss any of her matches, either.


“It was not a hard choice (to give up football for a season),” said Doug Smith, the team’s defensive backs coach the past four seasons. “We knew if Emily was playing volleyball, we were going to do this.”


Emily Smith, a 5-6 senior for the DePauw team, is a defensive specialist. Heading into Friday’s match with Taylor University, the Tigers were 7-2. She was leading the team in digs and receptions of serve.


Doug Smith said it wasn’t really an issue to give up something he loved in favor of someone he loved.


“It wasn’t that tough, not at all,” he said. “I feel this is a good thing to do. I get to spend that time watching my daughter play, and I’m catching up on things with my wife, too, because she was the one who would be there to watch her when I was at football practice or Hope had a game.”


Hope head coach Dean Kreps said he and the other coaches have been able to adjust to Smith’s absence.


“My philosophy goes like this: My faith is number one, family is number two, the players’ education is third and, for me, football is close behind,” Kreps said. “Sure, it’s an adjustment on our end, but I can’t say family comes first then not live it out.”


Smith’s players are in good hands. Joe Nelson coaches the defensive ends and defensive coordinator Mike Ricketts has taken charge of the cornerbacks.


Smith admitted he wasn’t beyond trying to dig up information about Hope football scores during breaks in the action at volleyball tournaments. But he said he’s a dad first and a coach second.


“I do miss the football, but I’m not going to miss out on my family’s activities, especially their senior seasons,” Doug Smith said. “We made the commitment and we decided to bite the bullet. It’s a buy-now-pay-later thing, but it’s worth it.”

Great article about how some coaches and high schools deal with the challenge of team sports that cannot keep everyone that wants or is good enough to play.


Copyright 2008 Courier-Post (Cherry Hill, NJ)
All Rights Reserved
Courier-Post (Cherry Hill, New Jersey)


August 31, 2008 Sunday


SECTION: SPORTS

HEADLINE: When a high school athlete doesn't make the team

BYLINE: CHUCK GORMLEY and CELESTE E. WHITTAKER

Courier-Post Staff

Twenty-seven years later, Washington Township High School athletic director Kevin Murphy can still recall walking down a seemingly endless hallway until finally reaching the basketball coach's office.

Like many other Iona Prep freshmen facing a similar fate, Murphy ran his trembling finger down a list of names, slowly making his way to the M's.

When the name "Murphy" did not appear, his eyes narrowed and a knot formed in his stomach.

"I remember it vividly," Murphy said. "Brother Timmoney called me into his office and said, "Kevin, you played great, but we only have 12 uniforms and you're 13.' On the way home, you could have filled a bucket with my tears."

Today, Murphy oversees the biggest high school athletic program in South Jersey, catering to more than 1,500 athletes in 31 varsity sports.

But at this time of year it's the athletes who won't be playing -- the ones who've been told during the last few days that they weren't good enough to make the team -- that tie knots in Murphy's stomach like the one he felt 27 years ago.

Of the approximately 700 student-athletes who have attended tryouts for Washington Township's nine fall athletic programs, roughly 600 will be given uniforms.

"That means one in seven will be cut," Murphy said. "That's a high number. And it's a cruel thing for coaches and athletes to go through."

Too small to cut

While coaches, athletic directors, parents and students agree on the cruelty of cuts, they are divided on their necessity.

Most of South Jersey's Group 1 and Group 2 athletic programs have no cuts at all, simply because the number of available roster spots often exceeds the number of participants.

"Our numbers are usually pretty low," Woodbury boys' soccer coach Marc Cannuli said. "We struggle to fill out a JV program. That puts us into a position where a lot of times we're placing seniors on JV instead of cutting them. We've never been in a position with our numbers to have to cut."

Willingboro athletic director Dave Riley said the only cuts made at his school are in basketball and baseball.

"With soccer, cross country and tennis, (coaches) keep the younger kids around, although everybody doesn't get to play," Riley said. "We can't afford to cut anybody here."

Moorestown tennis coach Bill Kingston led the boys' team to a Group 3 state title last season and the girls' team to a sectional crown. He can't remember ever cutting a female player from his program and has only cut male players a handful of times.

"If they come out and don't know which end of the racket to hold and don't know how to keep score, that can be a little tough," Kingston said. "We're not about teaching the first things about the game. We expect the students to have some knowledge of the sport and some ability.

"With those that are way down on the ladder, they're not going to be able to play every day, obviously."

Kingston said one reason he is able to keep virtually every tennis player is the number of facilities at Moorestown.

"We're fortunate that we have eight tennis courts, rather than four or five or six," he said. "We have more leeway. We also have outstanding assistant coaches dedicated to keeping as many students involved as possible."

Buena athletic director David Albertson said the size of his school's student body (just under 1,000) makes it difficult to even field teams.

"We'll take athletes right up to the last day of practices," he said. "Our coaches never shut the door on a kid who wants to play."

Buena has seven fall athletic programs that attract about 175 athletes. The largest program is football, which has 45 players divided among the varsity, JV and freshman teams. The smallest program is boys' cross country, which has six runners.

Seniors pay the price

Cherokee, a Group 4 school, has a no-cut policy in football but not in soccer, where more than a dozen athletes were cut from the program last week, including a handful of seniors who had played for three years.

Cherokee began cutting seniors five years ago, when a group of players who received little playing time became disruptive on the sidelines during games and in practices.

At Shawnee, boys' soccer coach Brian Gibney carried 26 players on the 2007 varsity team that won the Group 3 state title. Shawnee has won seven state championships under Gibney, who also has a no-cut policy.

"Kids make the decision on their own whether they want to be a part of a team, even if they don't see much playing time," Shawnee athletic director Sue Murphy said.

"For some kids, being involved in a program is just as important to them as playing time. My hat goes off to coaches who embrace kids that stay in a program for four years."

Washington Township boys' basketball coach Bob Byatt has been coaching at the high-school level for 27 years and has never cut a senior who has invested three years in the program and shown a willingness to be a team player.

"If a kid shows dedication and is faithful to the program for three years and we cut him, are we really teaching what we're supposed to be teaching?" Byatt asked.

"Now, if a kid doesn't show up in the summer or is a negative influence on the team, that voids the policy."

Kevin Murphy said the key to keeping some Washington Township seniors and cutting others is communication.

"Some kids say they want to be a part of something, and two weeks later they're frustrated and causing disruptions," he said. "A coach has to make a decision whether a senior is going to be unhappy.

"Any kid who is competitive is going to want to play. It's the responsibility of the coach to tell an athlete if he or she is going to be a third- or fourth-string athlete. Then the athlete can say, "OK, I really love football, and I'm going to stick with it.' Or, "I'm going to concentrate on my studies or get involved in student government or another activity.' "

Cutting themselves

At Eastern, field hockey coach Danyle Heilig has led the Vikings to nine straight Group 4 titles without having to cut more than a handful of players each fall.

"I kind of handle cuts different," Heilig said. "We don't get a ton of kids out. I honestly think kids know it's not easy, and if they don't want to be the best, they don't come out for the team. I try to be honest with kids. I feel with a school as large as Eastern, there's the opportunity for kids to get involved with different things.

"To work for three hours a day and to not play I don't think is easy. We try to be up front with the kids in that sense. We may keep kids that may not have a high level of skill or game knowledge. If they have a good work ethic, I'm going to keep them. But I am always honest in the preseason that they're probably not going to get a lot of playing time."

This year, about 50 athletes tried out for field hockey at Eastern, and Heilig says she will keep all of them, with 35 playing varsity and JV and 15 playing at the freshman level.

"This is one of the first years we've decided not to cut anybody," she said.

"They work really hard, love being part of the team and are enthusiastic every day at practice. To me, they deserve to be a part of it. They're working as hard as they can."

It is only when players put themselves above the team that Heilig will remove a player who otherwise deserves to be on the roster.

"I've cut kids who may have a little bit more skill or game knowledge than some of these other young women, but were very negative and had no interest in working hard," she said.

"I feel that negativity is contagious amongst the team. I don't like to keep kids like that around. That's how we kind of treat things."

Taking the sting out

Once a high school athletic program deems it necessary to make cuts, it must determine how to deliver the news to the heart-broken athletes.

"It's by far the hardest and the worst thing about coaching," Byatt said. "I dread it, and every year I lose sleep over it."

Many South Jersey coaches post the names of those who make the team on school Web sites. Kevin Murphy believes that method conjures up too many bad memories of walking down that long hallway 27 years ago.

Murphy decided seven years ago that the coaches at Washington Township would begin informing players of their tryout decisions with sealed envelopes.

The players who make the team are given congratulatory letters, and the players who are cut are given letters informing them when the coaches will be available to discuss their decisions.

"It's a hard letter to give a kid," Murphy said. "But sometimes it's even tougher for a student athlete to be told face to face by a coach that you didn't make the team.

"The letter gives kids time to collect themselves and maybe share it with their parents."

Byatt said that of the 25 athletes he is forced to cut every year, an average of five take him up on the offer to discuss the reasons they were cut and how to improve.

"Putting a list on a bulletin board or online, that's the easy thing to do," he said. "If those kids make an honest effort, they deserve an explanation."

Byatt said he gives athletes a few days to gather their thoughts before meeting with them. During his meetings, he provides a checklist with the player's strengths and weaknesses and offers each the chance to participate in offseason activities with the team.

"Most times, a young man is not listening clearly if you speak to him right away because of the emotions involved," Byatt said. "But it's important that they learn to talk to adults, even when they are upset."

Amazingly, Byatt said that in his 27 years of coaching, he does not recall a single player who returned for a face-to-face meeting that did not make his team the following year.

Hard lessons for parents

One of the most common refrains from high school athletic directors is the number of complaints they field in the days and weeks following cuts.

In one case, the father of a cheerleader who had been cut walked into an athletic director's office with a picture of his daughter and asked how such an injustice could occur to such an innocent girl.

As the director of The Center For Sport Psychology in Philadelphia, Joel Fish has spent years counseling parents and young athletes on the emotions associated with high school athletics.

"Sometimes an athlete feels kind of ripped off, and as a parent it's hard to be objective," Fish said. "Some parents have invested a lot of time and money into their kids' athletic careers, and they expect results.

"I've seen parents try to file petitions to get coaches fired or stage a mutiny against a coach."

It wasn't until his 11th-grade son was cut from his high school football team that Fish realized firsthand the responsibility a parent has when a high school activity is taken away from his or her child.

"All parents logically know it's just a game," Fish said, "but emotionally, it's hard to take the high road. Even the most well-intentioned parents, when they have their buttons pushed, can say things they don't necessarily mean."

Four-step process

Fish said there are four steps parents should take after their sons or daughters are informed they've been cut.

The first is to allow the athlete the opportunity to react.

"When you're passionate about something and you put your heart and soul into it and it doesn't work out, it hurts," he said. "Let them be angry or frustrated or sad."

The second step is to offer words of advice, encouragement and perspective.

Fish said a parent's recollection of being cut in high school or getting passed over for a job opportunity often gives children proper perspective.

"Stay away from associating strength and weakness to making a team," Fish advised. "Some parents will say, "If you're strong or tough, you'll get back out there and make it next year.' It's not about being tough or strong or weak.

"Once we introduce language like that, we're running the risk of characterizing kids."

If an athlete feels the need to speak with the coach, Fish said the third step for a parent is to encourage the child to schedule a meeting.

"It's not easy for grown-ups to talk to their bosses, and it's no different for high school kids," he said. "To me, the role of a parent is to help their kids learn the skills to express themselves."

If a coach is unwilling to meet with an athlete, or the meeting has an unsatisfactory result, Fish recommends parents schedule a meeting with the coach or athletic director as a fourth and final step.

"Time and place is important," Fish said. "You should approach a coach the same way you approach a teacher. You wouldn't walk into a teacher's office and say, "How dare you give my daughter a C!' "

Fish said it's also important for athletes to understand that a player's identity should not be connected with the sport he or she plays.

"A kid's whole identity needn't be wrapped up in a sport," he said. "A kid should say, "I'm Joe Smith, who likes to play football,' not "I'm Joe Smith, the football player.' "

Fish said parents need to recognize the qualities and talents in their children that are unrelated to sports, and emphasize that they love them for who they are.

"It's not like they are going to throw their arms around you and say, "Thanks, Mom,' or "Thanks, Dad. I feel so much better," Fish said.

"They may look like they're not even listening. But parents play a big role in planting the seed on the lessons that can be learned from getting cut."

Staying involved

When a sobbing Kevin Murphy informed his father on their car ride home from Iona Prep that Brother Timmoney offered him a chance to stay with the basketball team as a manager, his father told him it was an opportunity he had to take.

"I told my dad I didn't want to sling towels over my shoulder and fill water bottles and keep score," Murphy recalls. "He said to me, "If someone leaves the door open an inch, knock it down.' "

Murphy practiced with the team as a manager, earned a spot on the team as a sophomore and went on to play basketball in college.

"I was no Michael Jordan," Murphy said, referring to one of the most famous examples of a player who rebounded from being cut in high school, "but if you want something bad enough, people see it and sometimes you get rewarded."

Of course, for every example of a high school athlete's persistence paying off there are dozens more of athletes who never again try out for the sport, protecting themselves from more rejection.

Riley said he's seen a number of players transfer to other high schools to give themselves an opportunity to play. That, however, is becoming more difficult to do.

In March, the New Jersey State Interscholastic Athletic Association adopted a new policy for sophomore, junior and senior athletes who transfer without changing residences. Those athletes must now sit out an entire season.

Previously, those transfer athletes were forced to sit out just 30 days.

"They're cracking down on that," Riley said, noting that even freshman transfer students must now sit out 30 days at their new school.

At Eastern, Heilig realizes some of the second-stringers on her roster are good enough to start for other South Jersey programs and could be sacrificing college scholarships because their playing time is limited on her nationally recognized program.

Still, she believes there is a lot to be gained from being on a team, even if it means not playing much.

"I think you learn and gain so much from being part of organized sports on a day-in, day-out basis," she said.

"I don't think high school sports are for everybody. They're a privilege, not a right. And everybody has different philosophies."

Byatt agreed, saying cuts in high school basketball are necessary.

"Naturally, you want these kids to succeed and feel good about themselves," he said. "Kids are already so hard on themselves, and that's why cutting is so brutal.

"Some of the kids would have run through a wall for me, and when we make cuts, those same kids are standing there crying. No matter how it's done, somebody gets hurt."